I had a panic attack last night and today, well, today I feel like shit. During a break from the rain I went out into the world to walk Winnie. The sky -both blue and cloudy- was beautiful in a way I’m pretty sure only exists in Los Angeles. Clear, crisp, and slightly haunted. IContinue reading “panic! and the aftermath”
Author Archives: Kendra Alvey
Let’s Get Wacky
The more I learn about adhd, the more fascinated I am by the strange ways mine presents and how it plays with the other issues I’ve developed as coping mechanisms. Take people pleasing. This is a pretty great little thing to have on the surface. People pleasing has given me the ability to be onContinue reading “Let’s Get Wacky”
The Top 12 Books I Read in 2022
This post is supposed to be the top ten books I read this year but, look, it was a quality reading year for me. I was so lucky this year! Every other book I picked up was wonderful. To write this list, I took out my little notebook and jotted down every single book IContinue reading “The Top 12 Books I Read in 2022”
What I Learned in 2022: I Have ADHD
Dreamy, spacy, quirky. A Pisces, an airhead, an empath. Scattered, out-of-it, easily overwhelmed. Overemotional, hypersensitive, reactive. Naïve, spontaneous, immature. Not living up to potential. Anxious. Prone to depression. Quick to anger. A catastrophizer. Hypervigilant, paranoid, just off, different, floaty, makes mistakes, thinks outside the box, not serious, right-brained, fickle, head in the clouds, forgetful, intuitive,Continue reading “What I Learned in 2022: I Have ADHD”
The Top 10 Books I Read in 2021
Reading in 2021 was, for me, both a pleasure and a challenge. I read far fewer books this year than usual. At the time of this writing, I have just barely completed my Goodreads goal of 52 books. The year before the pandemic, I read 84 books. In 2020, I read 67. No clue whyContinue reading “The Top 10 Books I Read in 2021”
15 Years of Hogan McSmalls
We joked that Hogan McSmalls was a baby replacement. My sister had just had a baby. So had a couple of friends. But, he wasn’t, not really. He was much more than that. In 2006, I had a chronic illness that kept me home all the time. Exhausted, in pain, and alone too much, IContinue reading “15 Years of Hogan McSmalls”
Mentally I’m Here
It’s after midnight and I’m on a yellow dog moving slowly down a two-lane highway somewhere in West Texas. Everyone’s asleep except for me, the school bus driver, my coach, and the chaperone. Between the Smiths songs coming through my headphones, I can hear coach and chaperone speaking quietly to each other up front, inContinue reading “Mentally I’m Here”
The Top 13 Books I Read in 2020
I couldn’t bring myself to do my usual ‘Top 20 Things I Learned in 2020’ post because even though 2020 was pretty much non-stop No Exit-style epiphanies, fuck this year. Seriously, I’m so mad, I can’t even be in the same room as 2020. But, books? Why should my annual book list pay the toll?Continue reading “The Top 13 Books I Read in 2020”
10 Book Series to Disappear Into Until Further Notice
I have a long history of needing to be distracted. Chronic pain and health issues, anxiety disorder, depression. I’ve dealt with them all in various ways over the years and one thing I’ve learned is that distraction always ALWAYS helps. Yes, we need to work. Yes, we need to volunteer and march and donate andContinue reading “10 Book Series to Disappear Into Until Further Notice”
The Top Books I Read in 2019
Hello and welcome to my favorite post of the year. BOOKS! YAY! Last year I read a whopping 84 books -the most I’ve read possibly ever but for sure since I started keeping track. I know people who easily read 150 in a year but that’s never been me. I always hover around the 60-70Continue reading “The Top Books I Read in 2019”